"Salamate Lai He Hina Allane"

Rey Lasano 12:07:00 PM
"Welcome, to the village of Allang"



I visited a quite remote village called Allang on my trip to Ambon back then. The two spots I was dying to see were Tanjung Allang and Pasir Putih Beach. My Ambon-raised cousins volunteered to take me there and I dragged all of my other cousins (the city boys and girls) to come along.

The trip was............
You know, when they said "no pain no gain", I believe they were talking about going to Allang. Hahaha.. it was hard to get there, and to have the best view (and possible jumping spot), we have to cut through a forest of some kind.
The bright part of the so-called-forest. Almost felt like doing a Survivor shot of some kind haha..
But, after stumbling here and there, we're finally there and the view was amazing, it was worth it.
There's no need to edit this photo, seriously.
Despite its clear and calm appearance, my cousins told me that Tanjung Allang is actually one of the most dangerous areas for ship and boats alike and people need to be really really careful when crossing this beautiful place.
I often find myself wondering, that striking blue colors on the waters, is it the reflection of the sky above? Or is it the sky that mirrors the ocean?
That rocks I'm standing on, they are really really sharp. But to compensate that a little bit, you've got these shiny yellow flowers for your eyes. The contrast they brought with the blue ocean and the sky behind was perfect.
On sunny day like this, those yellow colors stand out like no other
yellow yellow on the ground, I don't wanna look the other way around~
All was well, but I have to remind you though, that in Allang it felt like you have at least two or three suns above your head. It wasn't just sunny -- it was real hot. Like literally you will get an instant sunburn just by standing there without long sleeves / hat / sunblock cream / whatever protection means you can get. So prepare well. And avoid skin cancer.
Lasano-Telussa-Sohilait Dynasty. Consisted of natural adventurers.
Coming into conclusion that staying out in the open in Tanjung Allang any longer will definitely give us premature sunburn even before we arrived at the beach, we decided to leave. The road to the beach was a small road and required us to climb several many stone staircases.
Is that... rock on both side of the road? They are huge.
Staircases. And more staircases. Mm. Love 'em.
When you reach the top of the stairs you could see the green of the forest and the ocean afar. It was quite stunning, although I remembered everyone was sort of short of breath and the hot weather did not help at all. But all in all, I was really happy. Going to this place fulfill my hunger for adventure, my love of running, climbing -- physical activities that helps me feel alive. Listening to my own fast heartbeat, feeling the blood rush and sweat and aching muscles, all to be rewarded with beautiful view after we completed the "trial". 
They should build some sort of flying fox unit in here. Imagine flying from this forest straight to the beach below. I'd climb those stairs all over again to fly more and more.
When we finally reached the Pasir Putih beach (by taking motorbike taxi a.k.a "ojek") everyone was so excited and kind of forgetting all the climbs and tiring road we walked earlier. The first thing I noticed on this beach is that the kind local people have made a tree swing overlooking the beach in front.
It is not the best tree swing in the world, but it was enough.
the happy team
And then the beach itself? I don't have any complaint, nope, not a single one. One thing for sure, Ambon is truly blessed with its magnificent beaches. The water, the sand, the reefs, everything that made up a good beach is here. The atmosphere, the natural surroundings, the sounds around you -- everything. Sure, they haven't build the best infrastructure and it can be quite a struggle to reach these places without a local guiding you, but if you're an explorer and doesn't mind to get lost a few times, you will love it here.
My cousin's been teaching me a thing or two about photography and she volunteered as a model. How did I do? :D
The most beautiful spot on Pasir Putih Beach!
With the burning sun, those waters feel like a whole new level of 'freshness'
My baby cousin (who's pictured in red above) told us that she wanted to see the sunset landscape here on the beach. Her wish, unfortunately, has to be put on hold, because look:

The sun was high, and guess what, it was 05.00 pm. So my older cousins reminded us that we still have a long way to go, back to the city of Ambon and there was no way we could wait till the sunset is set. With that in mind, we set off and left the beauty of Pasir Putih Beach. 

I am so glad I came here.
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Semoga Indonesia Tetap Rukun

Rey Lasano 4:10:00 PM

Salah satu proyek dalam Kemah Kepemimpinan 2013 lalu adalah latihan jurnalistik. Latihan dilakukan dengan menugaskan kami layaknya para wartawan untuk mencari berita dan menuliskannya. Berita yang kami tulis kemudian diberikan feedback oleh salah seorang pentolan koran Tempo. Tidak bisa dibilang sebagai pengalaman paling menyenangkan, tapi saya rasa ada saatnya kita belajar melalui hal-hal yang tidak enak, tidak nyaman, dan membuat kita ingin memberontak dari berbagai segi.

Proyek itu membawa pengalaman tersendiri untuk saya, yang baru pertama kali melakukan simulasi mencari dan menulis berita. Prosesnya lumayan seru dan mempertemukan saya dengan banyak hal tak terduga di balik gang-gang rumah kontrakan di Cinangka.  Ada cerita di sana dan berbagi cerita tersebut adalah salah satu hal yang dapat saya lakukan untuk membuat kisah mereka terdengar.

Semoga Indonesia Tetap Rukun

“Anda dapat kapan saja bepergian dan berwisata mengunjungi negara saya. Tetapi saya tidak bisa pulang ke rumah sendiri.”

Aziz (26) menatap mata saya lekat-lekat. Ia adalah salah seorang dari delapan pengungsi asal Myanmar yang sekarang tinggal di Kampung Cinangka, Megamendung, Jawa Barat. Kedatangan mereka difasilitasi oleh badan PBB United Nation High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) dan secara resmi dilindungi di Indonesia. Siang itu saya bertemu dengan Aziz dan ketiga temannya, M. Suman (26), Kabir Hussain (25) dan M. Sobuz (28) di sebuah warung nasi di Kampung Cinangka.  Ketiganya menceritakan bahwa belumlah genap dua bulan semenjak kedatangan mereka di Tanah Air, meninggalkan Myanmar yang semenjak dua tahun silam kisruh dengan konflik agama. Mereguk kopi dan menyalakan rokok, Aziz kembali bercerita. “Jumlah kaum muslim hanya sedikit di Myanmar. Tapi kaum Buddha tidak henti-hentinya mengejar, menembaki, mengusir dan membenci kami.” Konflik antara para penganut agama Buddha dan Muslim di Myanmar mulai mendapat perhatian internasional sejak insiden Rohingya yang terjadi pada awal Juni 2012 silam. Sejak saat itu, situasi terus memanas dan ketegangan antara umat Buddha dan Muslim tidak dapat dikendurkan.

Setelah tinggal di Indonesia, Aziz merasa lebih nyaman, meskipun tidak dapat sepenuhnya tenang karena masih ada keluarga yang ditinggalkannya dalam ancaman kematian setiap hari. “Di Indonesia, saya merasa aman.” kata Aziz. “Kami tahu ada banyak penganut Kristen, Buddha dan agama lainnya di sini. Tapi kami sama sekali tidak takut. Kami tahu kami aman.” Hussain menambahkan. Sehari-harinya para pengungsi ini bangun pagi, berbelanja beberapa bahan makanan di pasar, kemudian kembali pulang dan memasak. Sesekali mereka makan di warung nasi Bu Oom, yang selalu mereka panggil dengan sebutan “kakak”. Setelah itu seringkali mereka saling mengunjungi kediaman pengungsi-pengungsi lainnya dan saling berbagi informasi. Informasi biasanya berkaitan dengan keadaan di negara masing-masing dan kemungkinan kesempatan berbisnis atau bekerja. Menjelang sore mereka akan mampir di Masjid Al Taqwa untuk beribadah sebelum pulang dan beristirahat. Keseharian ini telah mereka lakukan selama enam minggu berturut-turut di Kampung Cinangka.

Kampung Cinangka merupakan salah satu kampung dalam naungan Desa Cipayung di Megamendung, Jawa Barat. Penduduk di kampung ini sudah tidak heran lagi dengan adanya warga negara asing yang berseliweran di jalan-jalan kecil kampung mereka. Ibu Oom (44) pemilik warung nasi dan beberapa rumah kontrakan di Cinangka misalnya, telah terbiasa mengontrakkan rumahnya untuk para pengungsi dari Somalia, Irak, Afghanistan, Sri Lanka dan Myanmar. “Mereka pengungsi legal, mereun (mungkin). Dibantu kedutaan, mereun.” Ibu Oom berbicara dengan logat Sunda yang kental. Menurutnya di kawasan Megamendung, Bogor dan sekitarnya ada banyak para pengungsi dari negara konflik. “Di Cibereum juga banyak. Kalau disana itu banyakan pengungsi Irak, neng. Yang hidungnya mancung-mancung pisan.” Canda Bu Oom. Bu Oom kemudian menjelaskan, bahwa para pengungsi mengontrak rumah dengan harga dua juta rupiah setiap bulannya. Untuk makan dan kebutuhan sehari-hari, rata-rata menghabiskan uang satu juta rupiah per bulan. Para pengungsi umumnya membuka rekening bank dan mendapatkan kiriman uang seadanya dari keluarga di negara masing-masing untuk memenuhi kebutuhan mereka. Mereka sulit mendapatkan pekerjaan di daerah Cinangka karena adanya keterbatasan bahasa dan masih membutuhkan waktu untuk menyesuaikan diri dengan budaya lokal.

Para pengungsi, meskipun sangat lega karena mendapatkan rasa aman di Indonesia, namun mereka juga merindukan kehidupan sebelum konflik mulai terjadi di Myanmar. Aziz, terutama, rindu untuk dapat membaca buku. Sebelumnya di Myanmar ia memiliki akses yang mudah setiap kali ingin membaca buku. “Apakah Anda dan Tempo bisa memberikan buku berbahasa Inggris untuk saya dan teman-teman?” tanyanya penuh harap. Bagi Aziz, Myanmar dulu pernah menjadi tempat yang nyaman untuk ditinggali. Namun kini, ia merasa ditolak oleh negerinya sendiri. “Presiden tidak menginginkan kami. Oleh karena itu kami ditembaki dan diusir. Masjid-masjid kami dibakar, lalu rumah kami dirubuhkan.” Aziz kemudian menunjukkan beberapa foto yang dimilikinya. Ia menunjukkan wajah bangunan dan jalan-jalan di Myanmar sebelum dan sesudah terjadi konflik. Jenazah dapat tergeletak begitu saja di jalanan, tidak peduli laki-laki, perempuan atau bahkan anak-anak. “Mereka menembaki kami yang bertangan kosong.”

Hidup para pengungsi sebagai kaum minoritas di Myanmar sangat berat namun, mereka sangat berterimakasih kepada Indonesia dan penduduknya yang ramah. “Kami menyukai Indonesia. Makanannya, rokoknya, kopi dan para penduduknya. Kami sangat menyukai negeri ini.” kata Suman. “Saya suka nasi kuning, tapi tidak makan soto.” tambah Kabir Hussain sambil menyunggingkan senyum. Aziz kemudian menambahkan bahwa kedepannya ia berharap dapat juga membawa keluarganya ke Indonesia. Untuk saat ini ia ingin terlebih dahulu mendapatkan pekerjaan tetap supaya dapat membantu menghidupi keluarganya. “Terimakasih.” kata Aziz. Ia berharap Indonesia akan selalu menjaga kerukunannya. Karena ketika Indonesia turut mengusir sekelompok orang karena agama yang dianutnya, pada saat itulah Aziz akan tahu bahwa ia tidak lagi memiliki tempat dimanapun di dunia ini.
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Jatuh Cinta pada Indonesia

Rey Lasano 9:28:00 AM


Jatuh Cinta pada Indonesia

Memangnya, perlu merantau jauh dari tanah air dulu baru bisa mengerti seribu hal dari Indonesia yang selama ini hanya kita terima dengan cuma-cuma?

Saat bersekolah selama satu tahun di sebuah universitas di Jepang, saya berangkat dengan keyakinan bahwa saya akan belajar banyak tentang Jepang dan kebudayaannya. Tidak sabar ingin membuktikan apakah kehidupan sekolah di Jepang sama dengan yang digambarkan Hana yori dango, penasaran dengan distrik fashion Harajuku dan Shibuya, setengah mati ingin merasakan tradisi hanami (makan dan minum sambil melihat bunga sakura) dan ingin mengunjungi kota-kota bersejarah layaknya Hiroshima, Nagasaki dan lain sebagainya. Melihat ke belakang sekarang, betapa sederhana, naif dan egoisnya saya saat itu. Karena ternyata, justru dengan menjadi anak rantau di negeri orang, saya belajar lebih banyak tentang negeri sendiri.

Di kampus, saya bertemu dengan banyak mahasiswa pertukaran pelajar lainnya dari berbagai negara di dunia dan tentu saja, dengan para mahasiswa Jepang. Ada yang merasa familiar dengan nama Indonesia, beberapa mengaitkannya dengan Pulau Dewata, tapi tidak sedikit yang sulit percaya bahwa Bali adalah bagian dari Negara Kesatuan Republik Indonesia. Reaksi pertama saya adalah terkejut, karena tidak menyangka bahwa banyak sekali orang yang tidak tahu-menahu tentang Indonesia.

Saat itu saya berdiri di sana, di depan rekan-rekan saya dan menceritakan tentang beberapa hal yang berkaitan dengan kebudayaan di Indonesia. Seorang teman dari Finlandia memperhatikan pin Garuda emas yang saya sematkan di tas saya. Dan ia bertanya, apakah itu adalah coat of arm negara Indonesia. Pertanyaannya membuka diskusi panjang tentang negara kami masing-masing. Saya mencoba menjelaskan tentang simbolisasi Garuda, makna 17 helai sayap, 8 bulu ekor dan 45 bulu dada yang dimilikinya. Juga perisai Pancasila dan pita bertuliskan bhinneka tunggal ika yang dicengkeramnya. Si pria Finland kemudian berkata bahwa ia tidak tahu Indonesia ternyata adalah negara yang dibangun di atas filosofi yang sangat kuat, dan bahwa rupa-rupanya para pendiri bangsa memiliki visi yang sangat besar untuk negeri ini.

Rekan-rekan saya hari itu mungkin kembali ke asrama mereka dengan sedikit tambahan informasi tentang Indonesia, namun saya kembali dengan suatu percikan api yang memenuhi relung hati: saya adalah orang Indonesia dan saya ingin Indonesia dikenal lebih luas lagi sebagai negara yang kaya budaya dan penting untuk dikenal. Maka, saya kembali ke asrama dan melakukan riset besar-besaran melalui internet. Mengingat kembali sejarah, mencari tahu lagi tentang berbagai upacara adat dan kesenian Indonesia dan fakta-fakta yang sebelumnya terlewat begitu saja dari ingatan dan keseharian saya selama masih berada di Tanah Air. Lalu saya merasa lucu. Sebagai anak-anak Indonesia, kita adalah orang-orang yang semestinya paling mengerti tentang kebudayaan Indonesia. Kita hidup di dalamnya selama bertahun-tahun, kebudayaan itu adalah kita, dalam keseharian  kita, dalam cara kita menghayati apa yang kita miliki sebagai Bangsa Indonesia. Namun, saat merantau tiba-tiba saya diserang oleh kesadaran bahwa ternyata sebelumnya saya pun bukanlah orang yang menghayati dan mengenal kebudayaan sendiri dengan segenap hati.

Bagaimana saya akan memperkenalkan Indonesia, jika saya sendiri tidak mengenalnya secara mendalam? Melalui berbagai presentasi, tugas dan interaksi saya dengan rekan-rekan dari mancanegara, saya akhirnya menemukan jalan untuk pertama kalinya menyadari penuh bahwa saya telah jatuh cinta pada bangsa Indonesia.

Saya jatuh cinta pada negara yang memiliki lebih dari 17.000 pulau dalam wilayahnya. Saya jatuh cinta pada negara yang masing-masing pulaunya memiliki tarian, kisah dan legenda memesona, kepingan sejarah, ragam kepercayaan, sensasi makanan khas dan juga tradisi yang berbeda-beda. Saya jatuh cinta, pada negara yang berusaha merantai semua perbedaan itu dalam semangat persatuan. Saya jatuh cinta, pada negara yang memiliki kombinasi ragam keindahan alam, baik darat dan laut yang terindah di dunia. Saya jatuh cinta, pada negara yang masih jatuh bangun menata pemerintahannya.

Kemana saja saya selama 22 tahun ini? Apakah terlalu sibuk menggandrungi kebudayaan negara lain dalam era globalisasi? Apakah terlampau apatis untuk memperhatikan pertumbuhan negara sendiri? Apakah kelewat egois dengan terus mencemooh pemerintah tanpa merefleksi apa yang sudah saya lakukan untuk negara?

Dalam banyak kesempatan berpikir, saya bertanya-tanya apakah rasa nasionalisme dalam diri generasi muda Indonesia sekarang sudah menjadi terlalu tipis? Ada berapa banyak generasi Indonesia yang sama egoisnya dengan saya sebelum datang ke Jepang? Sebetulnya, saya merasa menyesal, tidak lebih cepat jatuh cinta pada Indonesia. Seharusnya, rasa nasionalisme sekuat ini sudah saya miliki sejak dulu dan tidak perlu menunggu merantau jauh-jauh untuk bisa menyadari betapa bangganya menjadi seorang anak Indonesia.

Cinta bangsa seharusnya ditumbuhkan dari pendidikan budaya dalam keluarga, di sekolah, dan masyarakat sejak usia dini. Saat saya menjadi siswa SMP bertahun-tahun silam di Jakarta, saya masih diwajibkan membaca karya sastra Indonesia. Sebut saja Layar Terkembang dan Anak Perawan di Sarang Penyamun karangan Sutan Takdir Alisjahbana. Namun dewasa ini, penanaman nilai-nilai budaya seperti itu telah semakin bergeser dan terlupakan. Padahal, hal ini penting dalam pembentukan karakter siswa yang notabene adalah generasi penerus bangsa. Contoh lain, pemerintah Indonesia belakangan menyadari tentang pentingnya penanaman nasionalisme, dan meyakini bahwa penambahan porsi jam mata pelajaran Agama dan Pendidikan kewarganegaraan akan menjadi solusi yang baik. Sedangkan, pelajaran-pelajaran tersebut masih seringkali didominasi oleh tumpukan teori dan hafalan.

Soe Hok Gie dalam Catatan Seorang Demonstran pernah berkata, “Patriotisme tidak mungkin tumbuh dari hipokrisi dan slogan-slogan. Seseorang hanya dapat mencintai sesuatu secara sehat kalau ia mengenal obyeknya. Dan mencintai tanah air Indonesia dapat ditumbuhkan dengan mengenal Indonesia bersama rakyatnya dari dekat.” Oleh karena itulah, rasa cinta tanah air tidak akan dimunculkan hanya dengan menghafal teori dan menambah porsi jam pelajaran Pendidikan Kewarganegaraan di sekolah-sekolah. Cinta tanah air tidak akan berakar jika generasi muda tidak dididik untuk mengenal kebudayaannya dari dekat.

Saya rindu, generasi muda akan terus-menerus jatuh cinta pada Indonesia. Saya rindu, perasaan cinta itu tumbuh seiring dengan pertumbuhan kami sebagai pribadi-pribadi Indonesia. Saya rindu, kami-kami ini akan dapat memperkenalkan Indonesia kepada dunia luas bahwa mereka akan merugi jika tidak mengenal Indonesia. Untuk itu saya rindu, pelajaran “kewarganegaraan” dan “budaya” adalah pelajaran yang menfasilitasi siswa untuk menggunakan inderanya demi meresapi budaya bangsa. Mumpung masih berada di bumi Indonesia, saya rindu generasi muda melihat, menyentuh, mencium, mendengar dan membaui budaya itu sendiri. Karena tempat mana lagi yang lebih tepat digunakan sebagai ajang eksplorasi budaya bangsa, kalau bukan di lahan bangsa itu sendiri?

Saat ini, saya berada dalam jalur pekerjaan yang memungkinkan saya memiliki akses pada pendidikan anak usia dini. Saya akan memulainya dari sini. Dari anak-anak muda ini, saya akan menularkan virus jatuh cinta pada tanah air. Dan saat mereka bertumbuh dewasa, saya berharap virus itu sudah merajalela di setiap nadi dan pembuluh darah mereka. Dan bahwa kami, anak-anak Indonesia, akan membawa virus itu kemanapun kami pergi.
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Selain perjalanan pendakian ke Gunung Gede, salah satu highlight tahun lalu bagi saya adalah mengikuti Kemah Kepemimpinan yang diselenggarakan oleh Tempo Institute. Kemah Kepemimpinan yang merupakan bagian dari KEM (Kompetisi Esai Mahasiswa) itu mempertemukan 30 anak muda dari berbagai tempat di Indonesia untuk mendiskusikan ide tentang bagaimana menjadi Indonesia. Seleksi pertama dilakukan dengan meminta para kandidat untuk menuliskan sebuah esai. Esai di atas adalah esai yang saya tulis untuk KEM Menjadi Indonesia 2013.

KEM membuat saya belajar banyak hal, dan mendapatkan banyak teman baru, manusia-manusia yang memiliki idealisme masing-masing dan tidak ragu menyampaikannya dalam diskusi. Perbedaan jelas terlihat diantara kami, dan tidak sedikit yang berdiri di kutub-kutub ekstrim dari sebuah pandangan. KEM lalu mempertemukan kami-kami ini dan memfasilitasi sebuah think tank, membiarkan masing-masing orang berproses dan mengemukakan idenya, imajinya tentang sketsa Indonesia. Proses ini bagi saya terbilang baru, karena saya didorong untuk berpikir dan secara jujur mengemukakan sketsa saya sendiri, untuk pertama kalinya secara intens mempertanyakan pada diri sendiri, "bagimu, apa itu Indonesia?" dan "apa yang membuatmu mau menjadi Indonesia?"

Dalam KEM ini pula muncul sosok unik Rocky Gerung, seeorang yang langsung mengambil posisi pengusik, seorang penggoda seperti dalam cerita Adam dan Hawa. Singkatnya, ia mempertanyakan ideologi 30 anak muda ini. Menantang dan menuntut jawaban logis, apakah kami percaya pada Republik? Sungguhkah Negara Kesatuan Republik Indonesia adalah sesuatu yang patut dipertahankan, tidakkah akan jauh lebih baik dan adil bila kita menjadi sebuah negara serikat? Pada kami yang meyakini Undang Undang Dasar 1945 dan pada kami yang sentimentil mengungkit kisah perjuangan para pejuang untuk mempersatukan negeri, pak Gerung bertanya, "Mengapa?" tidakkah ideologi kami tentang NKRI adalah ideologi yang "dipaksakan" melalui pelajaran Sejarah, melalui hal-hal yang kami telan mentah-mentah dari orang-orang dewasa di sekitar kami? Sesuatu yang menjadi bagian dari kami begitu saja, tanpa kami pertanyakan, tanpa kami hayati sebagai sebuah ideologi. Mengapa memaksakan negeri ini harus tetap menjadi suatu kesatuan? Tetap menjadi sebuah Republik Indonesia? Ia bahkan bertanya apa yang kami pahami dengan nasionalisme, sebuah pertanyaan mendasar yang ternyata telaah jawabannya jauh lebih dalam dari yang saya yakini selama ini.

Pak Gerung memang pengusik yang handal.

Kurang lebih seperti itu sepenggal nostalgia saya tentang KEM 6 bulan yang lalu. Kami diusik untuk merumuskan kembali "menjadi Indonesia". Lalu, tanggal 30 Maret kemarin, rekan-rekan dari Tempo Institute beserta para alumni berangkat ke Bandung untuk memulai rangkaian kegiatan Menjadi Indonesia 2014. 
Saya duduk di depan komputer dan sebuah senyu menyungging begitu saja. Sudah dimulai lagi, ternyata. Rangkaian kegiatan yang saya harap akan tetap menjadi proses berpikir ulang bagi para anak bangsa, dalam perjuangan merealisasikan sketsa Indonesia. Menurut saya ini proses yang penting. Tahun ini pun, saya berharap KEM akan menjadi wadah dimana anak-anak muda Indonesia dari berbagai paham, idealisme dan sudut pandang akan berkumpul dan berlatih memahami perbedaan, toleransi, dan patriotisme.
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I belong to the pure sky and the line of stars on the faraway milky way

Rey Lasano 3:23:00 PM
Of all my family and relative's houses, I love my grandparents' one the most. It is a 2 stories house in a village in Ambon with spacious garden, which my grandma filled with beautiful flowers and her collection of ferns. As far as I can remember, the garden was always  colorful, smelled great and there were no mosquitos around because gran planted some plants that she said was the natural repellent of mosquitos. There's a big tree by the left corner of the garden and when I was a child, there was a tire swing hanging on that tree. I spent a lot of time there, by that tire swing.

My grandfather said that my middle name was given to me because for some months the flowers around their garden weren't blooming as usual, and no one knows why. But then on the day I was born, all of the flowers suddenly bloomed in the same time. Grandpa said that he remembered the day as the day when the garden smelled the best. I still can't figure out whether my grandfather was telling the truth, or if he was just being a very convincing storyteller.

Last Christmas was a full house in my grandparents' place in Ambon. My aunties, uncles, cousins from all places were there. We laughed, danced, teased each other, chat, and had fun together and it was amazing. Everyone arrived at different times so after three days, we realized we had a problem. There wasn't enough room and bed for everyone to sleep.. my cousins and I find it pretty funny because since that everyone started to mark their place to sleep. On the couch, on the floor using mattresses, sneaking to my grandparents' room at night and sleep between them etc. Me, being a nomad, I slept at different spots every night muahahaha. I wasn't being a nomad alone. One of my cousin, 5 years younger than me turns out to be a nomad himself and we explored all the creative alternative for a sleeping spot every night. Then one day he came with this brilliant idea. On the second floor there's an open air space looked like a balcony where my grandparents always sit together for afternoon tea. He suggested we slept on that balcony and pretend we were out camping and sleep under the stars.

It was amazing.

I don't have many starry nights in Jakarta, and when I did, the stars don't really fill the whole sky, everyone kept saying that it was because of the pollution, the dirty air.
But that night in Ambon, I really slept under the stars. I lay down with my blankets and pillows and looked up and the line of stars... it was a magical view. I think the stars lulled me to sleep that night. Another nice part was waking up. I woke up to the sun rays on my face and the sky got brighter and brighter until it was pure blue and I really enjoyed the view. 

I really love that house.

That, plus a beach behind the house.


I often think that we do have to travel a lot, revisiting old places and trying to go somewhere new too, just to see where you really belong. We could not choose the place where we were born but certainly we can choose to see other places too if we want it.

I still have some posts left about trip to Ambon. But... I will probably have to put in on hold since next week will be the big day of the last exam ever in the university before graduation yaaay. So this week I'll be concentrating on that and hope to be back with good news. Anyway Jude is starting a new project combining Instagram and music here.  It's called Anthropoplogy: Music on your feed, I've seen her selection and most are new to me and I'm happy about it because she's broadening my range of knowledge of music. Hahaha.. I'm particularly attached to Zedd and his song "Find You" which is also will be one of the soundtrack for Divergent movie. Give it a try probably you'll be surprised.

Wish you a happy weekend!
I'm going to lost myself now reading Freud, Adler, Jung, Kelly and everyone else in between :3 
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Rey Lasano 9:51:00 PM










"..If I die tomorrow, I'll be all right.
Because I believe, that after we're gone,
the spirit carries on."
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the times we had

Rey Lasano 11:25:00 PM
"The Times we had."
It was written on a wall in Tallinn, Estonia. I found myself stumbled across the very picture of that wall time and time again through a very dear friend's social media account.
Tonight, I stared so long at that picture. My mind was full, but the funny thing is I don't really know why it feels so full in there, in my mind. I guess it's been quite a while it's been that way, but recently my mind feels more like a chaotic battlefield than a simply full and packed warehouse.
I think I can almost hear Cindy yell at me, "your mind is the source of everything that is a mess in your life. And most of them aren't even real."

 "The Times we had."
Why do they have to capitalize the "t" on Times?
I'm not sure I understand the meaning of that phrase. the times we had.

 There were times, when my closest friends are within my reach. There were times when everyone tells everyone what they were facing, how they felt, their fears, hopes and dreams.
There were times when it was easy to cry in front of each other, like it was not a sign of weakness and nobody needed to know if it was a right time to cry or not. We just cry when we need to.
There were times when everyone has time for everyone.
There were times when everyone was as close as skin, and nobody get hurt alone without someone else noticing it.
There were times when the night feels so rough but everyone stand up together and become each other's strength.
were those the times we had?

 Often now I find that those I loved the most are facing things that are either really really good and exciting or really hard and frustrating. Either way, those things drain too much energy out of them. Naturally, my reaction is to holdback. Because, how can I ask them to share my burden when I saw them struggling to carry theirs. When I try to tell Cindy about this, she looked amazed on what she called my mind playing tricks on me. And she was even more amazed because I actually do believe in the chaos my mind created. She said that, I am too stubborn to see that even though everything changes in our friends' lives, they are never too worn out to lend me a hand. That my big theory of "your-own-problems-have-drained-too-much-energy-i-can't-add-my-problems-to-your-life-too" is one big joke. It seems like as saintly as I think I am, what I'm doing is actually hurting me and possibly hurting other people too.

 now wait a minute.
Suddenly I'm the bad guy girl.

 I'm not being fair either, I get that. I didn't at least try to talk. I'm the one who changed, I'm the one who thinks that I need to find a right time to let things out of my heart. Fine, I get that.
I just don't know how to tell people about what I'm dealing with when I know that out there, others are struggling with so much heavier problems than mine. Won't that make you feel selfish?

 So,
How am I supposed to tell everyone that I am in fact, anxious about my theses defense thing and quite don't know what to prepare.... when I know that other people are fighting for their daughter's life that has been diagnosed with bone cancer? I can't be bugging them everyday just to let them know how nervous I am. Unlike me, everyone actually have a real life. like an everyday routine and they can become too busy and I am to sensitive right now to take even the slightest sign of "rejection" so I just chose to shut up.

 How am I supposed to tell everyone that I don't know what to feel towards the... geez I can't even write that. Right, next week will be the third anniversary, if one can ever call it an "anniversary" of my father's death. How am I supposed to tell everyone that I am pretty much afraid, anxious, agitated.. when I know that out there other people are struggling to fit in and find their places as a work force? In the crazy world of adapting, where everyone either enjoying working extra hours or actually getting sick being too tired... do I have to really be the crybaby one clinging to them every so often about my grief that has been going on for years. Really. I am such a selfish human being if I do that. And what about the Japanese that lost their kin on the 3/11 Tsunami? Their "anniversary" is like tomorrow. See? I'm not the only one grieving. I can't be too selfish. And I can't discuss this with my mom either. She would burst in tears, and that is the last thing I can handle right now.

 How am I supposed to tell.... other gazillion things that is running on my mind? I can't.

 But there were really times back then, when it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter how hard your own life is, it doesn't matter how busy you are, it doesn't matter how frustrating everything is, there were times when we can always... tell each other anything. always. and those were the times we had.
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Solace on Coconut Island

Rey Lasano 8:34:00 PM
"Indonesia is my motherland,
A graceful country always on my mind,
My home country I do glorify,
Always to adore as long as I live.
My motherland is peaceful prosperous,
Beautiful country so luxurious,
The Jasmine island is the adored one,
Since all of us were born.
Waves oh always waves,
Coconut trees off the shore,
Whisper and whisper,
King of adventurers.
To adore the land,
So beautiful so graceful,
Oh my motherland,
Indonesia."

This song is called "Solace on Coconut Island", written by the late Ismail Marzuki around 1940s. He was saying something about a beautiful coconut island that is called Indonesia, his homeland. I used to sing this song a lot in elementary school, but was wondering what exactly did Marzuki mean by "solace on the coconut island"?
My recent trip to Ambon triggered the memory of the song almost immediately inside my head. Especially on this beach. I hear you, Mr. Marzuki. This is solace on the coconut island.


This majestic beach is called Namalatu Beach, it is located in Latuhalat, Ambon. As usual, take an angkot with "Latuhalat" written on top of it, or you can rent a car, or a motorcycle and ride from the city of Ambon to this place. Riding a motorcycle will be a much cheaper option, but obviously less comfortable compared to renting a car.

 Namalatu Beach is well known for the beauty of its reefs and the beach's sand that is composed of small pieces of reefs. Too bad it was raining all day when I and my cousins went there so maybe the pictures will be a little dark, but I can assure you that bad weather didn't cloud the beauty of this beach at all.

there goes the coconut trees~
When the rain stopped just a little, I stormed out of this gazebo where we sat (and weep because we could not jump right into the water) and start walking around. Part of the area that goes by the name of "Namalatu Beach" is not really a big place. They have built some gazebos here and there, so people can sit around, sipping coconut juices and enjoying the beach in front of them.

 I don't know if this beach was safe for everybody to swim or not, since there were reefs below the water and the reefs were pretty sharp. Some locals said that it is one of the most beautiful diving spot, though.
Aside from the small gazebos on the sore, there is one big gazebo stood in the far east of the beach that happened to be particularly popular for young people.This gazebo literally built on top of a medium reef, and I can only guess that probably it is the reason why it's a popular spot.

If you climbed down that reef where the gazebo stand, you will be exposed directly into the water like this:

and I'm really happy about that. One friendly reminder though: the reefs are sharp, make sure you put on your flip-flops or sandals. The water was surprisingly warm, I was kind of expecting icy cold water, but it was warm and nice.

If you're standing in the bridge connecting the gazebo and the outer line of the beach, you could clearly see the beach line decorated by the slightly bended coconut trees, which always seems to wave and wave, as if they are calling people from across the sea to come over and see what Namalatu Beach can give them.


The other nice spot here take form on a bridge. But this is a special bridge, according to the locals this was the remain of once a strong castle there. The castle was long lost to history, and I've searched everywhere but find no scientific claim over this castle, if it did exist. But then, some things did lost in history I guess. This bridge go all the way to the ocean, much like the one in Liang Beach, although it does look a lot stronger and tougher. Instead of wood, this bridge is made of firm stones, I can almost imagining it in  castle form. 


I was careful when walking on top of this bridge, enjoying every step I took and the sketches of the reefs below the clear transparent water. I took a deep breath, letting the rather salty air of the ocean filled my lungs, wondering if it was really a part of some old, strong and powerful castle. As I crossed the bridge, the sky was getting darker again, thick clouds carrying raindrops, it was almost raining once again. Probably it was just me, but walking slowly on that bridge gave me goosebumps. Like I was going to penetrate a big storm in front of me, because, look at the sky ahead!

The bridge ends with this rectangular shaped stone, a small space right in front of the ocean line, where the water's shades become darker and darker, indicating the deep ocean ahead.


At first, I was reluctant to take pictures because it was dark and I was a little disappointed because then I could not take good pictures to share with you; all this beautiful scenery my eyes are blessed with. But my dear cousin insisted to take some pictures anyway and I can see now why she's right! The storm-is-coming-soon weather actually gave the photographs a strong effect! Or at least that's what I think. Haha..

The most amazing thing about Namalatu Beach, especially about the bridge is this:
You walked from the beach line, the shores, very well aware of the small group of reefs below the water, you walked and walked *preferably bare footed*, and then you reached that rectangular stone and looked around and gasp!

my pose is ridicolous. just ignore it, look! beautiful reefs!
That.. was one moment of... my breath being taken away and I was just standing there, mouth wide opened and... the scenery was just amazing, the water, the reef, the wind, the sound of waver, just everything! It was beyond beautiful! I don't know if beautiful is enough to describe what I saw there.


I was definitely grateful for a chance to witness the beach with my own eyes. 

"Waves oh always waves,
Coconut trees off the shore,
Whisper and whisper,
King of adventurers.
To worship the land,
So beautiful so graceful,
Oh my motherland,
Indonesia."

Oh, and I put the "Solace on Coconut Island" video here for you, in case you're wondering and want to listen to the song. This is performed by Victorian Philharmonic Orchestra, they've done covers for national anthem and other traditional songs and they are pretty good ;D enjoy!


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